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Can you reduce your hide with the Electric Slide?

Gerald w. Deas M.D. | , Mph | 2/21/2013, 4:56 p.m.
The Electric Slide will reduce your hide (backside) if, and only if, you do it...
Halloween will make your child scream

The Electric Slide will reduce your hide (backside) if, and only if, you do it for 45 minutes at least three times a week. That little stuff I see folks with large hides doing at dinner dances ain't doing one thing.

I admit, it gives you the confidence that you can still think as you skip, move from side to side, bend to and fro and turn left and right. I agree that this is quite a memory challenge, but the only thing you are doing there is exercising your brain and convincing yourself that you do not need ginkgo biloba or other mind-stimulating drugs.

Surely, when you are eating heaps of food, you do collect a great deal of fat in the gut and on the butt. This collection of fat will either give you an apple shape or a pear shape; however, whatever shape you ultimately see in the mirror reveals that you are collecting too much fat. Believe it or not, fat cells that make up fat deposits have an adverse effect on the action of insulin, which is produced in the pancreas. When the pancreas does not work well, diabetes is on the horizon.

If you really are going to reduce your hide, you have to get down and boogie for at least 45 minutes, three times a week. You will also have to reduce those calories. I would suggest you establish a hideaway plan. You know what that plan is? It is a system where you hide away food that you like, so much so that you are unable to find it. It is impossible to have a gallon of ice cream in the fridge and not want it. There is no difference between sitting in front of the TV set eating a bowl of ice cream and jumping up every 15 minutes to get a large tablespoon of that fat-laden dessert.

Another game you should play to reduce your hide is hide and seek. I'm sure you played it as a child and know what it's all about. If you have forgotten, let me enlighten you. Remember when you were a kid and played hide and seek, someone would be blindfolded and the other kids would hide? After removing the blindfold, that person would have to seek out his or her hidden friends. Well, it's the same way with food. I suggest that you hide those high-calorie items in places where you can't find them. I am a witness to this, as my wife hides cookies from me and I hide peanuts from her.

Finally, whether you have a pear or apple shape, whether you have a small hide or a large one, it pays to exercise and eat low-calorie foods. I promise that when you are at one of those $100 dinner dances and jump up to do the tribal dance known as the Electric Slide, everyone will be able to see that your hide has reduced in size.