This holiday season is unlike any other we have experienced before. Many of us are spending time by ourselves and not with our families and friends. Many of us are lamenting not being able to attend holiday parties, go shopping with friends, or gather with family for long evenings filled with holiday cheer. Many of us are still grieving the loss of family and friends who have died this year from COVID-19 or other causes. Either way, December is a hard month for many and the pain and loneliness is very real for some. Hopefully, for those who are feeling isolated or at a loss, you can find someone in your community and reach out to let them know you need help, a hug, a listening ear, a good laugh, or all of the above.
The pandemic is still real and sadly the Black community has felt the brunt of this virus in severe ways. I have been lucky thus far and have not lost anyone directly to COVID, but we do know this virus is aggressive and unsuspecting at times.
December is always an interesting month for me. This year it has been filled with political reshuffling as we prepare for new leadership in Washington, D.C. My professional life has been quite busy and I have not yet had much time to reflect on the meaning of the season. Thirteen years ago, I lost my aunt, grandmother, and grandfather in the month of December. All unrelated deaths. All on my maternal side of my family. The losses were sudden and so overwhelming, it was almost difficult to process the loss. Many families have lost so much this year, they are still sifting through emotions and trying to find their internal compass to keep going. Because of this, I am trying to actively practice compassion and understanding this season…with others and with myself.
As we know, people are struggling financially, emotionally, physically, and for some, spiritually as well. Now more than ever it is important for us to extend people grace during this holiday season. We have no idea what folks are really going through. Someone’s attitude at the checkout line may be because they are buying groceries with their last dollars or purchasing food for a friend or family member who is battling COVID. The sheer exhaustion so many people are experiencing at the end of this year may make it difficult for them to actually feel that the holiday season is among us. We can be the ones who change the tide. We can be the ones who are the small light of compassion and love for a stranger or someone for whom we care. We have a few weeks to create the community we want to see.
Christina Greer, Ph.D., is an associate professor at Fordham University, the author of “Black Ethnics: Race, Immigration, and the Pursuit of the American Dream,” and the co-host of the podcast FAQ-NYC and also What’s In It For Us podcast.